Archive | November 2013

Jeff Probst Missed Connection

Jeff Probst

Future Jeff Probst excitedly pointing at the Emmys after casting Ryan Muldowney in an upcoming season of Survivor leads to monster ratings and critical acclaim.

I recently passed by Jeff Probst as he enjoyed lunch with a friend on Ventura Blvd.  Since I didn’t have the guts to say hello, I dealt with the situation the next best way:  By posting a missed connection on Craigslist.  Since ads only stay listed on the website for a week, I’ve posted it below for posterity.

As of now, Jeff Probst has not responded.

Jeff Probst – m4m – 30 (Ventura Blvd.)

This afternoon, on my lunch hour, I walked past Jeff Probst on Ventura Blvd. He was enjoying lunch with a friend. I was walking off a turkey club and onion rings.As someone who’s seen every episode of Survivor for the last 14 years and has dreamed of being on the show since the age of 16, it was an exciting event.I wanted to stop and talk to him. Tell him about my superfandom. That there’s a box at my mother’s house stuffed with dozens of VHS tapes filled with Survivor episodes (and the exit interviews from the CBS early show. Jane Clayson was hot back then, huh?). That my high school classmates chastised me for wearing a Survivor t-shirt to school. That I wrote Survivor fan fiction as a teenager. That this behavior was probably a major factor in me not dating until college.I wanted to tell him about how I’m a less awkward John Cochran with 6 more inches in height and 80 more pounds of weight, with wit like Tyson Apostal and the gamesmanship of Boston Rob.If only I stopped and said hi, perhaps he would have immediately realized that he had Survivor’s next star standing next to him. Or maybe he would’ve been weirded out and called the cops. Judgment call.

Since I have a high moral code, and rule #14 of said moral code is “Never disturb a man while he’s eating lunch,” I turned away and continued my walk back to the office, wondering what might’ve been if I had only stopped and said hi.

I hope you enjoyed your healthy lunch choice. Me? I’m regretting two things: our missed connection, and eating the onion rings. They were too greasy.